Just last week my neighbour told me about a casual job opportunity with the elections that are coming up that sounded pretty good to me so in a random moment, I applied even though I thought that the job applications would have been closed. I'm so glad I did because the next morning I got a phone call offering me a position, no interview, just show up on the day as a polling assistant.
The other evening sitting in bed, I was starting to feel all kinds of anxious. It doesn't help reading a manual which tells you what procedures are if you're confronted with an angry voter or if you find suspicious packages lying around, but it was more than that. It was that uneasy feeling of being SAHM for so long and heading out into a strange workplace again. Ironic because this is an opportunity that is perfect and something I've prayed over and waited for.
Reading my friend Marilyn's post about being afraid on the eve of a dream being fulfilled, I had an aha! moment. I suddenly realized what it was that was making me uneasy. Susie Larson in her series Your Beautiful Purpose talked about this idea that we can have a dream that we hold in our hearts that seems far off and yet we long for it and are impatient for it. We can't understand why God doesn't give us the opportunity right now because we think we are ready for it. In actual fact the day comes when God has finished all his behind the scenes prep work on our character and starts opening doors to the opportunity but it's at that moment that we have a freak out and go waaaaait, no! I'm not ready yet!
The very fact that we see ourselves as not ready means that we'll be completely dependent on God for doing the job he has for us and that's the best place to be. Embrace the moment was Susie's advice. Feel the fear and do it anyway knowing that God has your back and that he defends and protects and upholds the righteous.
I completely get it. Marilyn is experiencing it as she trains Alpha course leaders in India and on a teeny tiny scale, I am experiencing it in stepping out into the paid workforce again.
What dreams have been far off for you and are suddenly becoming realities? Are you shrinking away from them or feeling the fear and doing it anyway?